Letting Go of What's Out of Our Control: Strategies for Stress-Management

Season #1

Letting Go of What's Out of Our Control: Strategies for Stress-Management

On this episode of Spark Influence, Peter Phillip and Misty Phillip talk about the importance of maintaining strong relationships even amidst busy schedules and unexpected crises. They discuss  the importance of prioritizing self-care, the role of faith in coping with stress, and the value of taking small steps to tackle overwhelming issues. Overall, this episode emphasizes the need for couples to communicate and work together to overcome difficult periods in their lives while staying grounded in their values.


Topics covered in this audio session:

  • Approaching overwhelming issues
  • Importance of self-care in maintaining a healthy relationship
  • Letting go of things outside of our control
  • Practical ways of relieving stress
  • Taking time for oneself 
  • Coping mechanisms to reduce stress
  • The importance of tested faith in relationships and life

 Bullets for each topic:

Approaching overwhelming issues

  • Use analogy of reading an elephant "one bite at a time".

  • Share example of being diagnosed with cancer and breaking it down into manageable steps.

  • Encourage taking small steps and seeking support from family, friends, and professionals to work through difficult situations.

  • Argue that having a strong foundation in a relationship can help couples overcome large issues
    Importance of self-care in maintaining a healthy relationship.

  • Use analogy of putting on an oxygen mask first on a plane.

  • Acknowledge some women struggle with feeling selfish for prioritizing their self-care.

Prioritize seeking God's kingdom first

  • Letting go of things outside of our control.
  • Highlight ability to compartmentalize our minds and focus on what we can do to affect change.
  • Discuss personal struggle with letting go of things and how relationship helps to recognize when to move on.
  • Differentiate when to focus on working the problem vs when to let go of things outside of our control.


Practical ways of relieving stress

  • Recommend exercise, rest, and breaking down large projects into smaller tasks to avoid feeling overwhelmed.
  • Mention the importance of casting our cares on the Lord and identifying small steps to work through problems.
  • Taking time for oneself.
  • Encourage simple things like taking a walk and having quiet time for prayer and reflection-

Scripture Reference

Answer me when I call, O God of my righteousness! You have given me relief when I was in distress. Be gracious to me and hear my prayer! - Psalm 4:1 ESV

Coping mechanisms to reduce stress.

  • Believe that prayer and meditation can help ease stress and provide clarity
  • Discuss importance of analyzing how one copes with stress as a couple. 
  • Emphasize need to be conscious of these mechanisms in order to be prepared for times of stress.

The importance of tested faith in relationships and life.

  • Use analogy of Indiana Jones having faith to step into a chasm and finding a bridge there.
  • Tested faith is reflected in relationships and life.
  • Believe that having faith that God has good for us is key.

Efforts to connect despite busy schedules

  • Value FaceTime together and make concerted effort to connect every evening and morning.
  • Note that unexpected work crises can occur, but making time for each other is still important.


Life with Intention: "We explore spiritual growth, leadership development, and the art of influencing others positively at home and work."

"Syncing Up in Stress: How do we maintain our stress levels when we're juggling all the things?"

"Dealing with Stress: It's in these moments when it's crucial for us to check-in on ourselves and with one another."

The Importance of Daily Quiet Time: "For me in particular, I know that that daily quiet time, prayer, all of that helps to keep the stress at bay."

Stress Relief: "I like to feather my nest. Like, that is something that when I do that, it sort of helps me to let go of of whatever."

"The Importance of Community Support: It helps me to process some of my problems with my friends as opposed to bombarding you with every little thought I have."

"The Power of Women's Friendship: Sometimes we share our burdens with others or we seek advice or we just have a listening ear that can provide that perspective that we need because talking to one of my girlfriends is gonna give me a different perspective."

Letting Go: "You can compartmentalize your mind in ways where it things don't bother you. You don't think about it."

Self Care in Relationships: "I wanna just encourage you to stay synced up with yourself by by giving yourself self care coming into your relationship with your spouse or your family members or even your coworkers if you're not married."

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